Of course Mike Huckabee created “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day.” Other than being bigoted, Mike used to be obese. Now he’s just bigoted, which makes him an ideal role model and brings a whole new meaning to the song, “I wanna be like Mike.”
I wonder, does Chick-Fil-A instruct its employees to ask, “Do you want fries with that hate?”
I could waste my time arguing about the insanity of showing appreciation for hatred. On the flip side, truth be told, it’s more in keeping with the spirit of things. In fact, showing appreciation for hatred perfectly reflects the current reality in America.
Why stop with “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day?”
Let’s celebrate “Massacre Appreciation Day,” to show universal support for unhinged gunmen. Or “Birther Appreciation Day,” to celebrate Donald Trump’s birthright to piss in a separate bathroom, so he doesn’t have to see a black penis and wrestle with inadequacy. Or “Torture Appreciation Day,” to celebrate the high benchmark left by Dick Cheney who, instead of sexy, brought torture back.
In summation, “Chick-Fil-A Appreciation Day” is a testament to the founding father’s timeless proposition that all men are created equal in their resentment for each other.